I admit it. I’m an anti-goal-setter. Goal setting is frustrating to me. I only make a goal if it matters to me in the first place.
I have to know that the result I want will definitely happen, or I won’t even attempt it. I can’t get my head wrapped around how it will actually help me.
I think one reason for this goal setting neglect has a lot to do with my personality type. I’m an INFJ personality type which means I’m not much of a detail person. I like to paint big pictures and follow my nose.
Self-doubt and worrying it won’t be worthwhile in the end. Occasionally (very occasionally) lack of focus
What type of incentive do you usually need?
That I have the possibility of reaching something I really, really want.
I tend to set goals from a negative place, beating myself up (you NEED to do this-or else you’re a failure) I always fear the worst.
Even though I haven’t set firm goals in the past, I’ve had a vision for my life. I know how I want my life to look and feel and how I want to operate within it. I like creating and having a vision. I want to have the time and flexibility to follow my inspiration even as I work toward my goals.
I dont really like setting goals because they come from an obligation. I would like to set goals for fun and approach them, and approach life, in a much more fun, relaxed, way.
I do not like trying too hard. This is difficult to explain, and most would probably not agree, but has to do with the over-emphasis many humans put on hard work, effort, and bettering oneself; reaching your goals (and setting goals for that matter). It has all become a bit kitschy and maudlin in my opinion. It is a trend of sorts, and I do not like trends.
I don’t like where I’m at. And probably the most “recommended” advice I’ve been given is to “change it”. How? Goals/hopes/dreams seem to be a good direction giver. But what do you set in my position?
I want money, so I can buy things I want, and so I can feel somewhat independent. But I need to get a job. And even just the thought of getting a job, after my past experience, is petrifying.
“I’m lonely and want to date”. Hey look, it’s a cute girl, she looks single, no ring, etc. But how do you even approach her and make small talk? I’m horrified.
Family situations keep building up. God is aware of my situation, I just need to be patient. But how much longer can I be patient WHEN EVERYONE AND EVERYTHING AROUND ME IS PROGRESSING AND SUCCEEDING!
But darned if I haven’t discovered very late in life that if you want to make your vision a reality, you have to do some of that pedestrian work of setting goals.
If you have a vision of . . .
- doing work you love;
- finding the love of your life;
- having freedom and flexibility;
- enjoying fun and adventure;
- making a certain income;
- getting or staying fit and living a healthy lifestyle;
- having great relationships;
- or any other wonderful dream for your life or work . . .
Then you have to set a few goals, define some actions, plot them on a calendar, and actually follow through with them — if you want your vision to be more than a pipe dream.
The existential depression and boredom never completely go away.